lifestyle

I am finally sharing the third part of this *journey*, the transfer on what happens to be the week of the 1 year mark of our second loss and the bursting of the ectopic pregnancy and cyst that was the first domino of the past year. But for this post, I am keeping it positive because I am so thankful we had a successful transfer!

So, to back up. You do your retrieval, get the final embryo count, possibly do testing (we did), and have the absolute number of healthy transferable embryos. From there we went straight into a transfer cycle, aka new meds to prep the body. These meds include estrogen and progesterone (and others I am blanking on) in form of shots, pills, patches, and vaginal suppositories. Yes, vaginal suppositories. Your mix and amount of these will vary and change throughout the month and let me just say this because I really don’t think any men are here……stock up on panty liners, hell stock up on pads – trust me, it’s not cute. For the shots, they are in your bum and for me personally didn’t hurt too bad but everyone is different!

You start these meds a few weeks leading up to the transfer and continue them until 10 weeks pregnant. Now for the actual transfer, it is WILD. At our clinic, they rolled in an incubator that had a petri dish with the embryo for us to look at, it was again, WILD. The Dr. picks it up with some tool and you watch on the screen as he pops it into your uterus. The entire thing took I want to say 15 minutes and then you go home and wait. That is when for me, it got weird. Did it work? Am I pregnant? They have you wait about a week before coming in for a blood test to see if the transfer stuck and if you are indeed pregnant. In that time, some people do take an at-home test, but I did not…despite by every-other-day asking Mike if I could. It starts to eat at you but (in my opinion) there is no win in doing so, the possibility of it being negative but in fact, it’s just too early is high, and then if it says yes but between then and the blood test something could happen…so I wouldn’t. On the day of the blood test, we really thought they would call on the earlier side of the day so Mike worked from home and of course they did not call until 3ish but the news was good, I was pregnant!!!! Here is the lowdown on the schedule from there:

November 29th: Transfer

December 8th: Blood Pregnancy Test

December 12th: Blood Work (make sure everything is trending where it should)

December 28th: First Ultrasound (around 6-7 weeks pregnant)

January 4th: Ultrasound (I had subchorionic hemorrhages, they are what I like to call little bruises from the implantation that do not affect the pregnancy at all but the pockets of blood do release which is alarming. They are fairly common but this ultrasound was an extra one as I was nervous about them)

January 12th: Graduation from IVF clinic at 9 weeks! You have a final ultrasound with the Dr. and they send you off to begin routine care with your OB.

After “graduation” we went and got ice cream and ran into the OB who did my second surgery which was kismet and was amazing to tell her the good news!

That was a lot of information but I hope informative and helpful for those interested! Let me know if I forgot anything or if there are questions…you know I am an open book!!

Well this is a wild blog post to write considering I have had this blog since 2012 and have probably talked about a few different boyfriends on here!! Gotta kiss a lot of frogs right…? Quick summary of the proposal, Mike and I had a week long Jackson Hole trip planned for a few months and I really thought he was going to propose there. Two nights before I was in a terrible mood all day and kept saying “we are going to walk off this bad mood, let’s go!” and I really tried to get out of it. A few blocks in I got the pep back in my step- he knows me well. So, prior to leaving Mike put on real clothes, khaki shorts and a non graphic tee – I asked him why he was getting so dressed up and he said he had to change the ju-ju for the Yankees game. Mike is a huge Yankees fan so I didn’t think twice. So we get to the mid-point of our walk, which is the prettiest area in our neighborhood, and he goes “the reason I got so dressed up is….” and got down on one knee! He had Bailey hiding behind a tree snapping photos, it was so perfect!

We left two days later (on his birthday) for our trip and it was PERFECT. Any men reading this – propose BEFORE the trip not during. The entire week was a dream and the stress was off both of us.

Now, if you know me you know I have zero chill or patience so the wedding was practically planned in the next few days. We decided on April 2021 for a few reasons one being, we don’t know what the future holds and want to begin our lives together. We understand it is beyond a tricky time and many people will not attend and that is okay with us….and on a lighter note I have always wanted to get married in April! Now that all that business is out of the way, let’s move onto the fun stuff!!

We are getting married in April at our favorite place, Tiny Boxwoods! I am truly giddy just typing that – eek! As you can tell from the mood board, it is going to be a giant garden party! Will do more on vendors, bridesmaids, engagement photos, how we made decisions next!

Below is all of the advice people shared on Instagram:

• Register for China people say its outdated but it’s the best – I have been excited to register for China since I was like 14 years old. We did this past week and I am obsessed with what we picked out!! 
• Invest in Biologique Reschere skincare – done and done just ordered a few new items! 
• When figuring out your guest list, imagine who you want/hope to be in your life 20 years from now – I used to always joke I don’t want a wedding that is a reunion! 
• Regular Facials starting now!!
• Zola F-ing sucks, take the time to register at individual stores – this made me lol, we did a local store and a big box! 
• Sk-II Sheet mask – 2 people said this, the second said everyday the week leading up! 
• Go on your honeymoon the next day – its the best feeling!
• Don’t hesitate to try on an unexpected dress or one you would have never considered – got my dress 4 days after getting engaged online and I am IN LOVE!! 
• Don’t overthink things, make a decision and move on!
• Heart shaped sparklers make for exciting photos! – Saw this on TikTok the other day too! 

In mid-December, I told my friend Katie (RIP Daily Crush) that I wanted to get my boyfriend a trip over a physical gift. She was not only supportive but it quickly turned into a couples trip that she surprised her fiance with. Fast forward just a few weeks, MLK weekend is here and the lists from friends were still rolling in with Mexico City recommendations. We made a curated list from all the lists I had received based on vibes, IG feeds and neighborhoods. We didn’t make any reservations and decided to semi wing it, try to get into places on the list but also pop into places that looked cute on the way. Below is a diary of each day, and a list of everywhere I went. I LOVE chatting so please comment or message me any questions you may have!

Tips:

–  Mexico City doesn’t do bars as we do in America. Everything is sit down service and restaurants do not have bars you can wait at. With that- make reservations if there is a place you are dying to go to. That goes for both restaurants and bars- there were a few bars I was sad we couldn’t get into.

–  You will not look like a tourist in chic sneakers. Mexican style revolves around a good sneaker and layers.

–  Tipping options usually max at 15%, with 5-10% being average.

–  Sharing is caring, we did a lot of ordering and sharing then re-ordering of our favorite things.

–  The city is 10 times more lush and green than I ever expected! Beautiful, huge parks that have a very rainforest-y feel.

–  The most expensive meal we had was about $50/person and it was at the nicest place we went. Everything else was very cheap, talking $5 for two coffees and a pastry.

Friday: We got in around 2pm and had a 30ish minute uber to our AirBnB which was in the Condesa. We found an adorable little taco place- Departamento PB– that ended up being on one of our lists. It was filled with lots of mid-century modern furniture, and the best short rib tacos! From there we had dinner at Rosetta, which was on every list out there and there is a reason. The decor is so serene and romantic alongside delicious Italian food. The wait was about two hours (we forget to make reservations) so we walked to a bar and waited- no ‘text when your table is ready’ so wear your watch. We ended the night with a sweets nightcap at El Moro churros. I accidentally ordered hot chocolate instead of dipping chocolate but it was even better!

Saturday: Kicked off the day at an adorable coffee shop, Chiquitto in Condesa, before hitting the markets. We took an uber to Coyoacan and San Angel to explore the markets and neighborhood. They are both beautiful areas with so much color and history. For lunch, we went to el Parnita which had a long wait but was totally worth it. It opens right into the sidewalk where everyone is drinking, waiting for their table. Felt like one of the most local dining spots we went to- amazing people watching! We had a super late lunch so kinda skipped dinner and went right into checking out a salsa club a little early.

Tuna Tostada – Contromar

Sunday: Probably my favorite day because it was beautiful, I loved my outfit (haha) and we finally had a good understanding of the lay of the land. Mike and I stumbled into a bakery that made me giddy. Ballarò is half restaurant and half bakery with outdoor seating. When entering the bakery you pick up a cafeteria tray and a pair of tongs to pick out all the pastries and bread your heart desires from the walls. It seems so minor but it was such a fun experience. From there we went to lunch at one of the places we were all 4 equally excited about – Contromar. Mike and I got there right at 12:05 (they open at noon) to get us a table and there was already a handful taken. The place got packed with both locals and Americans within minutes. The way the employees turned tables and hustled was insanely impressive. Okay now to the food….when 4 people tell you to order the tuna tostada – you ordered it twice haha! But seriously the food was amazing! From there we headed deeper into Condessa and explored a few shops including Void Vintage which is probably one of the most beautiful stores I have ever been in. Right, when we walked in Mike spotted a vintage Ohio State tee shirt and I knew it was going to be a good day. Katie and I toyed a lot with staying in either in Airbnb or hotel so we had to check out Condesa df and their amazing rooftop. Highly recommend going and having a few drinks on the rooftop and exploring the hotel. After a very trendy day it was time for a little Mexican tradition- dinner at Cafe de Tacuba which has been around since 1912!

Monday: Short and sweet send-off at Cafe Nin which I would go to every day if I could!

Coffee/Breakfast:

–  Panderia (Roma Norte): One of the top places I was recommended to go. An adorable little bakery that is owned by the same people who run Rosetta. One of the best chocolate croissants I have ever had.

–  Chiquitto (Condessa) – tasty coffee, modern vibes!

–  La Valise (roma norte) – I am kicking myself because I can no longer find the exact place but there is a coffee shop in front of the La Valise Hotel that is SO cute! Stumbled upon it because of the cute building and insta-grammable plants outside and am just not realizing its a very popular hotel in both Mexico City and Tulum!

–  Cafe Nin  (Juarez) One of my favorite spots hands down- beyond charming and delicious!

–   Ballarò – all the pastries!

Food:

–  Departamento PB – dinner – amazing tacos.

–  Rosetta – dinner – the nicest meal we had in terms of $$, Italian food.

–  el Partina – lunch – super fun and very local aka great people watching!

–  Contromar – lunch or dinner – seafood, so delicious- order the tuna tostada!

–  el Moro – churros

–  *Lalo! – breakfast – still sad I didn’t get to go

In terms of drink spots, I am sorry to say I didn’t take note of them that much! As I mentioned it was a little harder to get into some of the places we wanted to go so we popped in and out of spots that look cute. This route was actually a little more fun if you ask me!

I am writing this because of an article I read that talked about how no one talks about their struggle when they are in the thick of it. Only after, when they are on the other side.

After about a year of living in Nashville, I realized that for my personal happiness there are 3 components that have to be in balance. Job, friends and a significant other. If I hated my job but had amazing friends to go to after or a boy to kiss, great. If friends were not strong in quantity or quality and I was single but had a job that was incredibly satisfying, great. You get where I am going? It is all about balance. After almost 4 years in Nashville, I felt like I could not find a consistent balance and I was over it. I missed my family and had a maybe 2 good friends in Houston, but at the time that seemed like enough. So last February, I made the drive back to Houston, the city I hadn’t lived in since High School.

What was I going to do for work? No idea, but it would be something I love because I was living with my parents and had that ability. Those first few months in Houston were amazing, full of weddings,  reconnecting with friends and exploring my city again. I got a part-time remote job with Bumble helping with the blog and Bumble BFF content. So great, right?! Life was great! Then in May, I got a job with a beauty startup doing social media. I was so excited because on paper it was my dream job. Running all of the social and digital marketing for a company that had huge wholesale accounts!  In the next 6 months, I moved out of my parents’ house, got an apartment in one of my favorite neighborhoods and reignited an old fling. Things were looking great with a capital G.

A few months later the old fling ended [again], the dream job wasn’t so dreamy and the dreaded 26, kicked off your parents’ insurance, birthday was creeping in. Days after my birthday, miserable that I was in a job I hated with little prospect of other opportunities, I was laid off. So there I was, newly 26 just having learned how to get my own insurance, wearing one of the two more than I could afford happy birthday to myself presents, in an apartment I still had 8 months in, jobless. JOBLESS.

If you are reading this thinking “this happens to everyone, it’s your 20s everyone is struggling and confused” please leave. Not trying to be rude and I get it but it’s like beating a dead horse and it’s actually very unhelpful ‘words of wisdom’. Becuase no matter how many times you tell me that there are millions of struggling people in their 20s that doesn’t make me feel better about being one of them.

What do you do next? Anything you can right? But there is that thing stupid thing called pride that seems to get in the way. Pride and judgment. Friends tone when you say “I will attempt the restaurant industry” but also frustrated when you can’t go out to eat. It is a sticky sticky balance and I was in the thick of it. I am already a homebody,  70% of me would rather stay in and 30% wants to rage. I am the person who sits on the couch sad that she doesn’t have plans but then the thought of reaching out to see what people are doing is not appealing and turns on a movie. This behavior mixed with not being allowed to spend a penny is really bad. I was getting weird.

So there I was, unemployed in a corporate city wanting to do something creative with social media. Not the best combo which had lead me into the of a spiral of why did I move to Houston? Why did you have to fall in love with social media? Why do you have ‘skills’ that majority of the jobs listed in Houston do not give 2 shits about? How do I become a boring 26 year old wide wife to an oil tycoon?  Is taking a photo of makeup really a skill? What am I going to do with my life in the short term? What happens when you don’t pay bills? Will the 2 hours I spent watching youtube videos on editing help my unemployment or my blog that does not make money? Reading your lease over and over to see how much they charge to cut it short. The list could go on and on and it does.

On a quick lighter note, having no income can result in two things: gaining a ton of weight or losing a ton of weight. Becuase you either go the route of ‘crap food and fast food are cheaper’ or ‘barely eat anything and eat random cans [of veggies]’. I was/am dead in the middle, a can of refried beans here, Mcdonalds there, sweet potatoes and eggs. every. damn. day. It’s a pattern I am getting used to but honestly wish my body could thrive on less so I could take the ‘damn she got skinny during her unemployment phase’ route.

As of 2018 things are starting to turn around and I will share more on that journey next. Finding the light at the end of the tunnel. But in conclusion, my time in 100% freefall was semi-amazing. I was able to think about what I want in a job. What I want in my next professional community. What I value in a company I work for. The saying “if you can’t laugh you will just cry” got me through the past 2 months. Don’t let me fool you there were a few full-blown breakdowns full of hyperventilating but for the most part, it was a “what the F is happening in my life this is comical” laughing. End tangent.